A wise man once suggested that he was the sole owner of Halloween, and given the fact that that man was Alice Cooper, who could possibly argue? There are several bangers us denim clad rockers can depend on once October hits – I’m the first to pop off about how hard goth shit slaps, but at the end of the day, Alice unquestionably holds the throne. That being said, I’ve decided to take my embarrassingly thorough knowledge of the real Prince of Darkness’ (sorry, Ozzy) discography and piece together a playlist of 31 spooky tracks to accompany y’all throughout the most wonderful time of the year.
GAIL – RAISE YOUR FIRST AND YELL (1987)
Man, this is just a horror movie in audio format. You got spooky ass organs and Alice singing about a rotting corpse. When I hear this shit, I think about those gnarly illustrations from the Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark books. Also don’t even get me goin’ about when this shit kicks in! Pure power.
FORMER LEE WARMER – DADA (1983)
Plucked from DaDa, which is easily the most underrated Alice record of all time, this shit always reminded me of The Changeling (1980). No real reason, really. Just a spooky secret in the attic I guess. Also basically singing about an unwanted child that is all mangled (possibly deceased) and hidden behind a locked door. Who even knows. Alice doesn’t remember writing this shit, so we’re SOL.
STEVEN – WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE (1975)
Okay, spoiler alert – There is gonna be a lot of shit off of Welcome to My Nightmare on here because it is the spookiest album of all time. Even extending beyond Alice’s discography, this is literally the best album of all time. Will die on this hill, but I digress. Steven was the first Alice song I had ever heard, and this shit is just… unreal. “I don’t want to feel you die, but if that’s the way that God has planned you… I’ll put pennies on your eyes. And it will go away, see?” – BITCH, THEY USED TO PUT PENNIES ON THE EYES OF CORPSES TO KEEP ‘EM SHUT, I’M OUT!
WIND-UP TOY – HEY STOOPID (1991)
So, I don’t fuck with jack in the boxes. They’re creepy, and this track opens with the sound of one. This is a pattern y’all can actually find throughout much of Alice’s discography, it is essentially about the mistreatment of a mentally ill child. Real shit, but it just got that spooky vibe. Plus, solitary confinement probably sucks super hard.
SEE ME IN THE MIRROR – MONSTER DOG OST (1984)
Okay, so I’ve gained a reputation for being a stupid bitch that doesn’t know shit about werewolf movies because I like Monster Dog (1984), but y’all… Alice transforms into a werewolf. How could you not dig that shit? That being said, See Me in the Mirror is a truly haunting track and the sequence it is featured in in the flick is equally eerie. A truly spooky, underrated banger.
TAG, YOU’RE IT – FLUSH THE FASHION (1982)
This is a track dedicated to slasher flicks. The lyrics outline the entire plot of one, and it directly references Halloween (1978) – Can I get a hell yeah?
DEAD BABIES – KILLER (1971)
I feel like the title here speaks for itself, but basically this song is about neglected babies that die because their parents suck. Sucks to suck. GOODBYE, LITTLE BETTY!
I LOVE THE DEAD – BILLION DOLLAR BABIES (1973)
Another title that kinda speaks for itself. Alice loves corpses, y’all. How good are songs about necrophilia? “While friends and lovers mourn your silly grave – I have other uses for you, darling.”
THE AWAKENING – WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE (1975)
Likely my favourite track off Welcome to My Nightmare, this track is about Alice waking up after a blackout only to discover that he had murdered his wife in the midst of his nightmare state. Haunting.
YEARS AGO – WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE (1975)
Back to back Nightmare tracks, Years Ago has a spooky carnival flair that I’m an absolute sucker for. This shit’ll take you into the spirit realm, man. Pure desolation and loneliness incarnate.
LEVITY BALL – PRETTIES FOR YOU (1969)
Okay, so y’all can’t have a list like this without including one of the spookiest tracks inspired by one of the spookiest movies of all time – Carnival of Souls (1962). Though the band didn’t really establish their sound ’til their third release, I feel like Levity Ball is the most on-brand track in their earliest roots.
THIS MANIAC’S IN LOVE WITH YOU – TRASH (1989)
The thing I love most about the progression of Alice’s discography is how well-suited it always was with the culture it was situated in. Lots of the late ’80s shit just feels like a dirty slasher flick with a high body count, and This Maniac’s… no exception. Imagine if Jason was horny for you, man. I mean… those camp counsellors were pretty damn hot, I could see it. Sleazy shit.
THE BALLAD OF DWIGHT FRY – LOVE IT TO DEATH (1971)
Firstly, Dwight Frye was a very real horror film star largely known for his portrayal of Renfield in Dracula (1931) and Fritz in Frankenstein (1931). Both aforementioned characters were neurotic and murderous, which is exactly the atmosphere this track taps into. Y’all legit get transplanted into the unravelling mind of a psychopath, and it slaps.
SICK THINGS – BILLION DOLLAR BABIES (1973)
I love this song because I feel like as simplistic and vague the lyrics may be, it really goes to show who the character of Alice is. Just a stumbling, demented child king, man.
THE BLACK WIDOW – WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE (1975)
Speaking of stumbling, demented child-kings… According to Vincent Price in this track, man has ruled as one long enough! This shit is a classic, and educational to boot. Learned more about widows during Price’s speech than I ever did in science class, man.
COLD ETHYL – WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE (1975)
Okay, so story time – When I was in the sixth grade, I wasn’t really big into lyrical analysis. I just listened to shit, if it slapped, it slapped. That being said, always thought this shit slapped, so when I put it on for my classmates, my teacher was (rightfully) horrified. BITCH, THIS IS ABOUT NECROPHILIA!
DADA – DADA (1983)
Straight up, I think this may be the creepiest song ever recorded. I dare y’all to put this shit on with headphones in pure darkness. It’ll fuck you up, big time – AND THAT IS A HEAVY HORROR GUARANTEE!
WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE – WELCOME TO MY NIGHTMARE (1975)
Duh.
BLACK JUJU – LOVE IT TO DEATH (1971)
Okay, I know all about Screamin’ Jay Hawkins and Arthur Brown, but this shit right here was the true beginning of shock rock. WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!
GO TO HELL – GOES TO HELL (1976)
Another criminally underrated album, this shit flirts with disco and funk. How evil is going to Hell though?? Literally the most evil shit of all time. “YOU’RE SOMETHING THAT NEVER SHOULD HAVE HAPPENED! YOU! EVEN MAKE YOUR GRANDMA SICK!” – Harsh, dude.
INMATES (WE’RE ALL CRAZY) – FROM THE INSIDE (1978)
From the Inside is a special album because Alice wrote each track inspired by folks he met in an insane asylum he occupied while going through rehab. This song is literally about unhinged people lighting churches on fire, loosening wheels on trains… Y’know, just whacky ways to murder folks. Dig it. Also, I first learned about who Lizzie Borden was because of this song. Once again, educating my dumb ass.
UNFINISHED SWEET – BILLION DOLLAR BABIES (1973)
While not necessarily a “spooky” song (unless you’re afraid of dentists), this track is all about rotting teeth after devouring too much Halloween candy. Essential.
HE’S BACK (THE MAN BEHIND THE MASK) – CONSTRICTOR (1986)
Y’all know this likely from Friday the 13th Part VI: Jason Lives (1986), and it has just kinda become an extension of that franchise as a whole. Pure summer camp slasher banger.
SKELETONS IN THE CLOSET – SPECIAL FORCES (1981)
Nothin’ spookier than skeletons and rattling bones, y’all.
I’M ALIVE (THAT WAS THE DAY MY DEAD PET RETURNED TO SAVE MY LIFE) – ZIPPER CATCHES SKIN (1982)
Gotta include because it is seems as though it is Pet Sematary inspired, but this shit pre-dates the novel by a whole year. I’m just sayin’!
FRESH BLOOD – DADA (1983)
This song is about vampires and it is so damn stylish. One of the best, really.
LIFE AND DEATH OF THE PARTY – CONSTRICTOR (1986)
Another pure ’80s undead raging party banger. Makes me wanna dance in a cemetery Return of the Living Dead (1985) style. Hooks for days!
LULLABY – THE LAST TEMPTATION (1994)
This feels like the ’90s equivalent to Steven. Boasts a childlike innocence tormented by malicious forces.
PICK UP THE BONES – BRUTAL PLANET (2000)
Brutal Planet is likely the heaviest album Alice has put out. Has a total ’90s metal flair to it that is unusual for his brand, but it works here. This track is literally about collecting the bones of his family members and lighting ’em on fire. Gnarly.
ROSES ON WHITE LACE – RAISE YOUR FIST AND YELL (1987)
One of the hardest hitting Alice tracks of all time, man. Pummels the shit outta ya right off the get-go. He’s talking about blood, duh.
FEED MY FRANKENSTEIN – HEY STOOPID (1991)
I mean, this one is a no-brainer and if I failed to include it, y’all would be pissed. Ghouls! Pizza! Riffs! ’90s Halloween personified.
